Secret Salu, Happy Birthday!
Salman Khan is back! From the cute romantic boy he was in Maine Pyar Kiya, to the naughty Prem from Hum Apke Hain Kaun to the shy and obedient son he was in Hum Saath Saath Hain, and from the hot and sexy shirtless player he’s always been to a grown man in the role of a loving father. Absolutely drop dead gorgeous. I’ve always thought of myself as a unique type of fan of his (as I’m sure all other girls think, but I’m still better =P ). When I was little, I used to dream of marrying him, eating poori chhole with him, singing songs with him. He was my all time imaginary friend. Whether he knows it or not, he and I are actually quite close, we’ve shared precious moments of our lives being best friends hanging out in my doll house playing pathetic pretend games. It was as if I had lost touch with a dear old friend all these years, and now he’s back. I totally brushed off his controversies with Aish and I chose to ignore the fact that he shot deer while shooting (his movie yaar!). After all, I knew him enough to know he wouldn’t do so!
Perhaps I’m just like all other fans of his, but I feel like I have a bond with dear Salu. I feel as if I can recognize truth in his work. And his work in Janeman made me cry. So this post is dedicated to my dear dear Salman Khan. I’m sorry that I didn’t stick up for you or be with you through the ups and downs of your career like I’m sure some of your other fans did, but hey then u must know I mean it when I say you’ve touched my heart once more and revived the little girl in me that wished to marry dear Salu. Too bad you like that pretty looking but ditsy seeming Katrina Kaif, but I guess I’ll just ignore that part about you too. Keep up the good work!
Oh and since your Birthday’s coming up on the 27th, hope you have an awesome time turning however old you are now (I don’t want to know that either)! It’s been great having you there during my childhood, and I hope that other little girls will always find a good Salu to look forward to in their future, and will also keep their expectations at least 5 feet 9 inches high.
Tuesday, December 19, 2006
Saturday, October 07, 2006
Hindu Enough
“The ox’s big head gets through the window, as well as its entire body, except its tail gets stuck.”
This sentence is as much a mystery to me at the moment as it is to you. Lately, there has been a lot of discussion on religions and the nature of religion. At least I feel a bit more acquainted with my own religion. I had read in a Hindu book once that religion is like your mother, one that you are born to. Converting to another religion is abominable to most Hindus, especially if one barely understood their own religion to begin with. It’s like betraying your mother, because after all, no matter what her method of teaching is, the result would ultimately make you a moral or ethical person. Of course that doesn’t mean to have blind faith. I’m out to discover whether I have any reason to betray my mother religion.
As it is, Hinduism seems to be a difficult religion to get out of; it only engulfs. The different schools and denominations unite together under Hinduism. Diana Eck points out that it is the diversity that Hindus have in common: “Diversity unites rather than divides”. Consequently, Hindus are prone to an open mindedness, along with arguments ready to defend their own belief when it comes time. This has been inherent in me, without being taught it. I realize now that it stems from my very own mother. Perhaps I wasn’t explicitly taught the Bhagvad Gita, or the Vedas, or the Puranas, but I feel their essence runs through my veins anyway. Even then, am I not a Hindu because I’m not a vegetarian? I think the several options in Hinduism suggest that neither one is the ultimate truth, and I don’t think it really matters. Hinduism exists without having a specific definition, then why can’t God? This is the true Hindu essence. “Neti Neti” . I love my religion because it coincides with my belief that the truth, whatever it may be, has infinite possibilities.
I know I’m definitely categorized as a “Hindu”, but the doubt arises because I just don’t have a strong belief because among these infinite choices, unless I put utter faith in one, I do not have true faith. I have faith in the infinity, but not in one, unless this infinity is simply one.
If everything is one, and if we are God, and God is us, then is it God or is it us? I think here is where the ox’s tail gets stuck. Can we really ever have a specific truth? The fact that Hindus cannot even come to a common definition of Hinduism, and that even Christians cannot agree on Christianity emphasizes that even though we extract the truth from all our different religions, we cannot free that tail that possesses the final truth. Until we do, we have the eternal truth that none of us know the Truth. No matter how close we get to the truth, the tail will keep the ox from getting through the window.
After all, even Melville will agree that the tail or tale is all we have to know the creator’s truth. Melville will even carry it further and say that we are all Ahab in trying to capture that whale, perhaps to find in the end that there is nothing to capture at all. But my human mind won’t let me believe Melville, maybe because to imagine “nothing” is simply inconceivable. Again, neti neti. Hah, at least I’m essentially Hindu.
This sentence is as much a mystery to me at the moment as it is to you. Lately, there has been a lot of discussion on religions and the nature of religion. At least I feel a bit more acquainted with my own religion. I had read in a Hindu book once that religion is like your mother, one that you are born to. Converting to another religion is abominable to most Hindus, especially if one barely understood their own religion to begin with. It’s like betraying your mother, because after all, no matter what her method of teaching is, the result would ultimately make you a moral or ethical person. Of course that doesn’t mean to have blind faith. I’m out to discover whether I have any reason to betray my mother religion.
As it is, Hinduism seems to be a difficult religion to get out of; it only engulfs. The different schools and denominations unite together under Hinduism. Diana Eck points out that it is the diversity that Hindus have in common: “Diversity unites rather than divides”. Consequently, Hindus are prone to an open mindedness, along with arguments ready to defend their own belief when it comes time. This has been inherent in me, without being taught it. I realize now that it stems from my very own mother. Perhaps I wasn’t explicitly taught the Bhagvad Gita, or the Vedas, or the Puranas, but I feel their essence runs through my veins anyway. Even then, am I not a Hindu because I’m not a vegetarian? I think the several options in Hinduism suggest that neither one is the ultimate truth, and I don’t think it really matters. Hinduism exists without having a specific definition, then why can’t God? This is the true Hindu essence. “Neti Neti” . I love my religion because it coincides with my belief that the truth, whatever it may be, has infinite possibilities.
I know I’m definitely categorized as a “Hindu”, but the doubt arises because I just don’t have a strong belief because among these infinite choices, unless I put utter faith in one, I do not have true faith. I have faith in the infinity, but not in one, unless this infinity is simply one.
If everything is one, and if we are God, and God is us, then is it God or is it us? I think here is where the ox’s tail gets stuck. Can we really ever have a specific truth? The fact that Hindus cannot even come to a common definition of Hinduism, and that even Christians cannot agree on Christianity emphasizes that even though we extract the truth from all our different religions, we cannot free that tail that possesses the final truth. Until we do, we have the eternal truth that none of us know the Truth. No matter how close we get to the truth, the tail will keep the ox from getting through the window.
After all, even Melville will agree that the tail or tale is all we have to know the creator’s truth. Melville will even carry it further and say that we are all Ahab in trying to capture that whale, perhaps to find in the end that there is nothing to capture at all. But my human mind won’t let me believe Melville, maybe because to imagine “nothing” is simply inconceivable. Again, neti neti. Hah, at least I’m essentially Hindu.
Wednesday, June 21, 2006
Just one ticket!
It’s empowering; it’s exhilarating; and above all, it’s enlightening.
You know those days when you really want to do something, and only that one thing? And you don’t end up doing it because you didn’t have anyone to do it with? Or maybe you were dependent on someone in some way that restricted your arms from spreading wide and tied your feet to the floor, stopping you from that flight.
Just get up and fly. It’s that simple.
I sat home for quite some time whining about how none of my friends are available when I really am in a mood to get out of the house, or about how I cannot drive to places I’d like to go to, and how I kept missing out on my life. Instead of sitting at the bus stop, and hoping that the bus would stop on seeing me, all I needed to do was get up and wave frantically until the bus driver had no other choice but to bow down to me and open that door!
I went alone to watch a movie today. The Break-Up. Total chic flick that I’m sure none of my friends were too inclined to watch. I could have let go of it just like the several other movies I miss out on with excuses that I’d watch it when it’s on DVD, or it wasn’t going to be that great a movie anyway. I decided, instead, on treating myself.
I took my ipod, and listening to Lucky Ali, walked to Barnes and Nobles. I read a bit until it was time for me to catch my bus (with those doors wide open) to the theater. After some walking, I got to the theater, feeling a bit nervous to ask for just one ticket. However, I don’t think the guy at the counter gave a damn, and then neither did I. I walked out of there with my head lifted high, involuntarily and happily walking straight-backed for the first time in my life.
I could hear the absurdity in those rumors of how I "stepped over" people in school to get to where I was. How is that possible if you don’t even cheat! It didn’t matter any more whether I looked ugly to the world, or whether people would think I’m a loser for going alone. I made that choice. I enjoyed my own company, I felt bonded with myself, and I did not need to fake a conversation with anyone to have them accompany me.
I smiled while I walked through the mall today, and maybe somebody else saw me, and felt empowered to ask for just one ticket.
You know those days when you really want to do something, and only that one thing? And you don’t end up doing it because you didn’t have anyone to do it with? Or maybe you were dependent on someone in some way that restricted your arms from spreading wide and tied your feet to the floor, stopping you from that flight.
Just get up and fly. It’s that simple.
I sat home for quite some time whining about how none of my friends are available when I really am in a mood to get out of the house, or about how I cannot drive to places I’d like to go to, and how I kept missing out on my life. Instead of sitting at the bus stop, and hoping that the bus would stop on seeing me, all I needed to do was get up and wave frantically until the bus driver had no other choice but to bow down to me and open that door!
I went alone to watch a movie today. The Break-Up. Total chic flick that I’m sure none of my friends were too inclined to watch. I could have let go of it just like the several other movies I miss out on with excuses that I’d watch it when it’s on DVD, or it wasn’t going to be that great a movie anyway. I decided, instead, on treating myself.
I took my ipod, and listening to Lucky Ali, walked to Barnes and Nobles. I read a bit until it was time for me to catch my bus (with those doors wide open) to the theater. After some walking, I got to the theater, feeling a bit nervous to ask for just one ticket. However, I don’t think the guy at the counter gave a damn, and then neither did I. I walked out of there with my head lifted high, involuntarily and happily walking straight-backed for the first time in my life.
I could hear the absurdity in those rumors of how I "stepped over" people in school to get to where I was. How is that possible if you don’t even cheat! It didn’t matter any more whether I looked ugly to the world, or whether people would think I’m a loser for going alone. I made that choice. I enjoyed my own company, I felt bonded with myself, and I did not need to fake a conversation with anyone to have them accompany me.
I smiled while I walked through the mall today, and maybe somebody else saw me, and felt empowered to ask for just one ticket.
Friday, June 16, 2006
I cleaned my desk out yesterday.
I cleaned out my desk yesterday. It was frustrating me that to pull out one sheet of paper, I needed to rummage through the entire mess, and then shove it back neatly into the same mess. Who would have thought, though, that cleaning can be so much fun after all?
Chucking away papers and work from a class you hated is always so fun. I could maliciously waste all the effort of a teacher who printed out mindless copies of paper. She was out to teach of the environment through such an utter waste of trees! And here I was, glad that the class was over, and taking my revenge through the virtue of cleaning. Why did I hate to clean anyway?
There lied my beautiful calculus papers. The hard work that I put into it resulted in more than just 20 lbs of papers. Now these were worth being neatly filed, separated by chapters, level of difficulty, tests, quizzes, notes, notes of notes etc. Can’t wait till I pass this knowledge on to others. Ah! Derivatives and Integrals!
One paper after another, my entire senior year’s experience flashed in front of my eyes. I’ve learnt so much, grown so much. I am actually enjoying this sorting of papers! I’m tempted to keep all of this. Who knows what I might need in college! My economics practice tests ... maybe when I’m bored, I’ll test my knowledge. Yet, if I keep this mindset, I won’t end up cleaning the desk.
And then I realized that cleaning a desk is such a critical moment of our lives! We need to make so many decisions. To keep or not to keep, that is the big question. Would keeping these notes on Shakespeare let me take him for granted? Maybe I should let go, so I can crave to have them again. Would keeping these old projects stunt my growth for newer creative ideas or would they add to my knowledge? Then, why clean at all! Surely, all this knowledge could sit and pile up into a scholarly mess! One scholar of a desk!
I threw out of the desk all that I thought I had gained, and kept what I still needed to understand, with plenty of room for new piles to create a mess that would require sorting again. The process is cyclical, you can say, except each time it becomes more fun, more challenging, and more productive. I guess I’m ready for college now.
That’s why I don’t like to keep my desk clean on a day to day basis, mom! That would make this experience a mere chore!!
Chucking away papers and work from a class you hated is always so fun. I could maliciously waste all the effort of a teacher who printed out mindless copies of paper. She was out to teach of the environment through such an utter waste of trees! And here I was, glad that the class was over, and taking my revenge through the virtue of cleaning. Why did I hate to clean anyway?
There lied my beautiful calculus papers. The hard work that I put into it resulted in more than just 20 lbs of papers. Now these were worth being neatly filed, separated by chapters, level of difficulty, tests, quizzes, notes, notes of notes etc. Can’t wait till I pass this knowledge on to others. Ah! Derivatives and Integrals!
One paper after another, my entire senior year’s experience flashed in front of my eyes. I’ve learnt so much, grown so much. I am actually enjoying this sorting of papers! I’m tempted to keep all of this. Who knows what I might need in college! My economics practice tests ... maybe when I’m bored, I’ll test my knowledge. Yet, if I keep this mindset, I won’t end up cleaning the desk.
And then I realized that cleaning a desk is such a critical moment of our lives! We need to make so many decisions. To keep or not to keep, that is the big question. Would keeping these notes on Shakespeare let me take him for granted? Maybe I should let go, so I can crave to have them again. Would keeping these old projects stunt my growth for newer creative ideas or would they add to my knowledge? Then, why clean at all! Surely, all this knowledge could sit and pile up into a scholarly mess! One scholar of a desk!
I threw out of the desk all that I thought I had gained, and kept what I still needed to understand, with plenty of room for new piles to create a mess that would require sorting again. The process is cyclical, you can say, except each time it becomes more fun, more challenging, and more productive. I guess I’m ready for college now.
That’s why I don’t like to keep my desk clean on a day to day basis, mom! That would make this experience a mere chore!!
Thursday, June 08, 2006
Heaven, A Christian Club?
Why do many Christians say that “accepting” Jesus Christ is the only way to achieve salvation? I’m a Hindu, so I guess I will miss out on my trip to heaven. That’s all right, though, because I’m quite content with my religion. Although I don’t think they’re wrong, I don’t believe in everything they teach because there is no way to know the truth. I just pick and choose what I truly like about the Hindu teachings and attempt to follow those. If Hindus don’t claim to know the “truth”, then why do Christians?
Don’t get me wrong; I don’t have anything against the religion. I just want to question certain things about the Christian religion that baffle me. Whenever I ask someone if indeed it says in the Bible that you go to hell if you don’t believe in Jesus, the reply has always been a hesitant, “yeah, pretty much”.
Does that mean that there is a heaven just for Christians? Does it mean that heaven may, in fact, just be a Christian society, where they are happy to have no dissenters? If so, I prefer going to hell, since there I can be with the rest of my family, and many of my other friends, who are of different religions. To me, that in itself, is heaven.
Two of my friends who were Jewish originally, converted to being Christians without their parents’ knowledge. They both had studied the Christian religion and found it to be the TRUE one. I felt compelled to ask them what they saw in the Bible that they did not see in the Torah. The answer was that they were now “saved” because of Jesus Christ. How so? Because now they get to go to the very cool Christian heaven, unlike the rest of us?
I usually do get a sympathetic look from the strong believers of the Christian faith, as if I’m to be felt sorry for because despite being a good human being, I might end up in Hell. Many of them have even told me that I don’t know the truth and that THEY do. Wouldn’t it be funny if they found me in heaven, and realized how foolish they were to waste their life pitying me, when God loves us all? Perhaps being good was enough, after all.
I found a discrepancy in their belief. Either my perception of God was completely different, or that we even have different Gods just like we have different heavens. A Catholic friend of mine told me that it’s the way most people interpret the Bible that causes the misunderstanding. Laura believed that when the Bible says that you must go THROUGH Jesus to attain salvation, it meant that Jesus is symbolic of the GOOD in the world, and therefore, you need to be a good person to go to Heaven. Makes sense to me.
Nevertheless, when I asked if that were true from my friend Jennifer, who is a committed protestant, and a pastor’s daughter, she refused. She explained to me that according to her, since Jesus was the son of God, yet also represented the perfect form of being a human, Jesus was like the “middleman” between God and humans. Therefore, when you die, you go to Jesus, and Jesus “presents your case” to God. He tells God that you have tried to imitate his footsteps throughout your life, and so he recommends you to heaven, and then God decides. So, basically she said that you need Jesus to get to God, and therefore to get to heaven.
To me, that made much more sense, yet I was still doubtful about certain little things. If God knows us so well, and loves us so much that he sent Jesus Christ to absolve us from our sins eternally, then why can’t we talk to him directly? Why do we need Jesus? Her answer was that God is so perfect, he cannot possibly know what it’s like to be human, and so he needs Jesus. God wants us to accept the proof of his love that he sent to us: Jesus Christ. Okay, I understand that now. I just don’t agree with it.
I think my God wants us to simply lead a good life whether you believe in him or not. I highly doubt that he wants recognition for his work although he deserves it (that’s if he really does exist). If indeed the Christian view turns out to be right, I’d be ashamed of my God, just because I, too, expect perfection from him, and that is not my view of perfection.
Don’t get me wrong; I don’t have anything against the religion. I just want to question certain things about the Christian religion that baffle me. Whenever I ask someone if indeed it says in the Bible that you go to hell if you don’t believe in Jesus, the reply has always been a hesitant, “yeah, pretty much”.
Does that mean that there is a heaven just for Christians? Does it mean that heaven may, in fact, just be a Christian society, where they are happy to have no dissenters? If so, I prefer going to hell, since there I can be with the rest of my family, and many of my other friends, who are of different religions. To me, that in itself, is heaven.
Two of my friends who were Jewish originally, converted to being Christians without their parents’ knowledge. They both had studied the Christian religion and found it to be the TRUE one. I felt compelled to ask them what they saw in the Bible that they did not see in the Torah. The answer was that they were now “saved” because of Jesus Christ. How so? Because now they get to go to the very cool Christian heaven, unlike the rest of us?
I usually do get a sympathetic look from the strong believers of the Christian faith, as if I’m to be felt sorry for because despite being a good human being, I might end up in Hell. Many of them have even told me that I don’t know the truth and that THEY do. Wouldn’t it be funny if they found me in heaven, and realized how foolish they were to waste their life pitying me, when God loves us all? Perhaps being good was enough, after all.
I found a discrepancy in their belief. Either my perception of God was completely different, or that we even have different Gods just like we have different heavens. A Catholic friend of mine told me that it’s the way most people interpret the Bible that causes the misunderstanding. Laura believed that when the Bible says that you must go THROUGH Jesus to attain salvation, it meant that Jesus is symbolic of the GOOD in the world, and therefore, you need to be a good person to go to Heaven. Makes sense to me.
Nevertheless, when I asked if that were true from my friend Jennifer, who is a committed protestant, and a pastor’s daughter, she refused. She explained to me that according to her, since Jesus was the son of God, yet also represented the perfect form of being a human, Jesus was like the “middleman” between God and humans. Therefore, when you die, you go to Jesus, and Jesus “presents your case” to God. He tells God that you have tried to imitate his footsteps throughout your life, and so he recommends you to heaven, and then God decides. So, basically she said that you need Jesus to get to God, and therefore to get to heaven.
To me, that made much more sense, yet I was still doubtful about certain little things. If God knows us so well, and loves us so much that he sent Jesus Christ to absolve us from our sins eternally, then why can’t we talk to him directly? Why do we need Jesus? Her answer was that God is so perfect, he cannot possibly know what it’s like to be human, and so he needs Jesus. God wants us to accept the proof of his love that he sent to us: Jesus Christ. Okay, I understand that now. I just don’t agree with it.
I think my God wants us to simply lead a good life whether you believe in him or not. I highly doubt that he wants recognition for his work although he deserves it (that’s if he really does exist). If indeed the Christian view turns out to be right, I’d be ashamed of my God, just because I, too, expect perfection from him, and that is not my view of perfection.
Glass Half Full
Somebody once told me they believed in what they wanted to believe in, and that stuck to me. Being full of faith that there must be some type of God, I was quite content with whatever was on my plate. I'd say that even if there isn't a God, it doesn't hurt to pray just in case someone is listening.
How can you believe in something that you really don't believe? You can pretend to, I guess. And what good is that? I want there to be God so badly, but I'm starting to believe that maybe we really just are. No purpose. No direction. No meaning. Just Life.
After that, how can you have faith in anything at all! Yet, what if you so badly want to have faith, because you have faith that in believing so, you will be able to accept situations, love them, and be able to move on to greater things.
In mere existence, if that is indeed why we are here, we have the (potential) truth. But what good is the harsh truth that only discourages one from Karma. Why does society crave to be stable, when our existence itself is not?
And of course as Keats says and I agree, "Beauty is truth, truth beauty, - that is all ye know on earth, and all ye need to know." To me, life is more beautiful with its mystery, and so I guess that's my truth. No need to unravel it. I don't want the truth, for once.
Whether there is a God or not, I think those that believe in Him are much better off. So don't find reasons not to believe, find reasons to believe. See the glass half FULL.
If you see the glass as half empty, yes you see the truth. But does the water you drink from the glass taste better knowing it is only half?
I know truth is beautiful, but so is faith.
How can you believe in something that you really don't believe? You can pretend to, I guess. And what good is that? I want there to be God so badly, but I'm starting to believe that maybe we really just are. No purpose. No direction. No meaning. Just Life.
After that, how can you have faith in anything at all! Yet, what if you so badly want to have faith, because you have faith that in believing so, you will be able to accept situations, love them, and be able to move on to greater things.
In mere existence, if that is indeed why we are here, we have the (potential) truth. But what good is the harsh truth that only discourages one from Karma. Why does society crave to be stable, when our existence itself is not?
And of course as Keats says and I agree, "Beauty is truth, truth beauty, - that is all ye know on earth, and all ye need to know." To me, life is more beautiful with its mystery, and so I guess that's my truth. No need to unravel it. I don't want the truth, for once.
Whether there is a God or not, I think those that believe in Him are much better off. So don't find reasons not to believe, find reasons to believe. See the glass half FULL.
If you see the glass as half empty, yes you see the truth. But does the water you drink from the glass taste better knowing it is only half?
I know truth is beautiful, but so is faith.
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