I feel the pulls of gender roles

There are currently many awesome life techniques that I find enticing – and I know these work – these are some techniques I want to take up because I think they help me accomplish goals and not get stuck somewhere without my goals being fulfilled. I hesitate though, because these are typically associated to being “manly” approaches to the world. They are less “girly” so to say – being assertive, being free, being open-minded, letting things go, being less miserly, being ambitious/motivated/enthused, being world-wiser, and being entrepreneurial.

It isn’t that I don’t know girls with these same amazing qualities – I do. Some of them have been my inspiration in helping me reach this point today. But somewhere, I honestly feel restricted in our ability to express who we are truly because we are trying to fit this gender role. Even when no one is imposing a standard on us, of course we are afraid to take on this new role – which may have unforeseen/ unknown/ unpredictable consequences for our lives. I’d be lying if I said I don’t notice this fear within me. Yet, I also have a commitment to honor my realizations.

So, why is it that men seem to have some of these life skills down? Why are they seemingly more forgiving? Why do they stress less? Even women would agree that “other women” do not easily exhibit thes behaviors. I saw a post on facebook the other day with men telling each other, “don’t try to understand women; women understand each other, and they hate each other.” I could understand where this post was coming from, unfortunately. Women do understand each other! But why don't women support each other? Why do we suppress each other? Why are we jealous? What is the fear? Why are women the ones that have these traits more so, and not men? Is it because there is some deep rooted feeling of “not good enough-ness” pervading in society that we need to overcome? And as some of us overcome it one step at a time– we are headed towards what seems “manly” but perhaps is just part of “human” evolution as people explore more sides of themselves, unrestricted by gender roles?

I realize, that men too are probably struggling with coming off “womanly” when they explore more sides of them. I wish we would let each other be – and see what comes about. Why would we restrict our men or our women to not be their full human selves? Isn’t this the ultimate merging of masculine and feminine within oneself? Why are we seeking to be halves when we can be “whole” as Oprah would term it? Why can’t be wholly human and STILL choose a partner just as whole as us – each capable of carrying forth any role, not feeling limited by his/her own “inability” to do the other gender’s roles.

So much love; in honor of all that I understand and all that I humbly don’t.